What inspired the Founders of GC to advocate gentleman culture?

Answer by The Gentleman:

Hi Muaz,

Thank you for your thoughtful and heartfelt letter.

It’s rare to find someone at your age with such a profound appreciation for culture, for the richness of the world’s civilizations, and for the deep questions you ask of yourself and others. The fact that you can hold space for both your personal convictions and your cultural curiosity is not just admirable—it is courageous. You are exactly the kind of mind and spirit we hope to engage within the GC community.

As founders of GC let us first say this: our community has never been about the West dominating the East or about abandoning our roots in pursuit of prestige. It’s about something deeper: the pursuit of excellence, the refinement of the soul, and the dignity of being human. The gentleman’s path is not a Western creation - it’s a universal aspiration. And our community reflects that. Our readers and contributors span cultures and continents - Malaysia, Singapore, Indonesia, Australia, England, France, the US, the Netherlands - and what unites us is a shared interests for grace and human potential.

To answer your question directly: no, we were not all educated overseas. And we do not come from one tribe, although we are all sons of Adam. Our founders and contributors are Malay, Chinese, Indian, US, and European—some born in Malaysia, others abroad. Our readers span continents—from Australia to Singapore, from the United States to France and Holland. GC is not driven by one dominant culture, but by a shared reverence for excellence—chivalrous, elegance, noblesse oblige, lineage, masculinity and high culture.

French illustrator revives the Byzantine Empire with magnificently detailed drawings of building: The Great Palace of Constantinople.

Antoine Helbert.

You asked: what inspired us to appreciate gentleman culture?

For some of us, yes, studying abroad opened our eyes. But many of us were first inspired not by foreign soil, but by books, architecture, conversations, and questions. One of our co-founders was captivated by the lost city of Constantinople – the best of east and west - before he ever stepped on a plane. Another stood in awe beneath the dome of Hagia Sophia in Istanbul, not just for its grandeur, but because it represents a peak civilization that merged faith, power, and beauty—without contradiction. From the Greeks to Romans to Byzantines to the Ottomans to the Turkish Republic, leaders preserved these testaments of intellect, not because they were secular, but because they were sacred. That is high culture.

We began GC not to imitate the West, but to highlight and elevate the best in man. Whether it's the eastern "priyayi" gentry preserved from Indonesia to the Japanese bushido, or the symmetry of classical European sculpture, or the "junzi" (君子) philosophy of Confucius —what we admire is not who, but what humanity has achieved at its peak. A gentleman, in our eyes, is not defined by tuxedos or wine lists, but by his pursuit of grace, honour, and refinement—in all things, including his struggles.

Culture, as you know better than most, is not always black and white—it is human. And humans are not perfect. And the role of a gentleman is not to submit blindly to the fashions of society, whether liberal or conservative-but to interrogate, reflect, and choose wisely. You seek guidance from your religious expert, and yet you do not relinquish your soul's yearning for beauty and complexity. That is commendable. Not rebellious. In fact, it is prophetic. Because from every golden age of civilization-from Babylon to Rome-the most celebrated scholars were also poets, musicians, scientists, and philosophers. In short, a renaissance man.

We understand, deeply, the tensions you've described—the real spiritual concerns, the community perception, the challenge of cultural legitimacy within a Malay-Muslim frame. Some scholars reject music or sculpture, but others—like Al-Farabi, Ibn Sina, and Al-Ghazali—saw art and beauty as divine reflections. We do not claim religious authority, nor do we ask others to compromise their faith. What we encourage is discernment: to dress well, to live well, to appreciate what is noble across time and space. But this is easier said than done. Throughout the years, at times, we know we’ve fallen from what an ideal gentleman should be. But that does not stop us to strive towards that ideal, day by day, one step at a time.

Is it difficult to champion this culture in Malaysia? Yes. But that is not our intent. We do not claim to champion any sort of culture. It is, rather, an invitation to deepen one's humanity on timeless universal values, irrespective of nations, social class, or cultural background. When we share about theatre, we’re not glorifying decadence. We’re highlighting storytelling, language, tragedy, and transcendence. When we write about fine dining, we’re not pushing wine—we’re celebrating conversation, intention, craftsmanship.

We are not here to make Malays less Malay. We are here to show that being a refined Malay gentleman is not only possible—it is something noble. Just look at HRH Tunku Abdul Rahman, who led our nation to independence in a baju Melayu and later addressed the world in a suit with poise and dignity. Or Prince Mateen of Brunei, who balances tradition with global sophistication. You can wear a tengkolok and a tuxedo. You can appreciate other faith and a line from Shakespeare. You can meditate and dine with etiquette. These things are not contradictions; they are complements.

In truth, GC was born out of frustration. Too many platforms either catered to fashion or celebrity gossip tabloids. We wanted something in between—a chamber where men could speak of elegance, excellence, and refined living. Not to impress others, but to elevate ourselves the call to live with meaning.

You asked us why we do this, knowing many Malaysian may reject it.

We do it because of that.

We do it for the young man standing alone, looking to rise again after an unsuccessful relationships or marriage.

We do it for the former student who unable to find any unique contents on the pursuit of refinement.

We do it for the elderly, who lamented the lost arts of dressing well in the modern society.

Thank you, Muaz, for asking the most important questions - questions many do not dare ask aloud. You are not alone. And your voice matters to this community.

Please continue this journey with us. We hope one day to feature you - your ideas, your story, and your cultural experiences - in GC. Because the world needs to hear more from men like you.

With gratitude,

The Gent

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Gentlemen's Code has your back! We're thrilled to announce our brand new section on our website: "Ask the Gentleman." Submit your burning questions on all things refined living, health & fitness, relationships, culture, style, and etiquette by emailing editor@gentlemanscodes.com.

Please note:

1. We no longer accept letters on marital or divorce issues.

2. We do not entertain unconstructive correspondence or hate speech.