Photo credit: GC Illustration.
Words: Cameron Driessen
Having two kids of our own, my wife and I make a conscious effort.
Not just to raise good children, but to raise confident ones. Ones who understand who they are, where they come from, and what they are capable of becoming and their responsibility to uphold our family legacy.
And while this is deeply personal to us, I believe it extends far beyond our household. Because whether you have children right now or not, this is something worth thinking about. It is your responsibility to instill values higher than your own. To the next generation, yes. But first, to yourself.
We teach confidence first as an instruction and then as a practice. We get our kids talking to people older than them. Having adult-level conversations. Presenting in front of crowds. Moving comfortably in high-level environments where most adults still feel out of place. We make sure they see, notice, and understand why we dress the way we do. Why we carry ourselves differently. And what something as seemingly simple as that actually does for you in the real world. Because in a world where people love to say you should never judge a book by its cover, that is precisely what most people do. Every single time. So if before you even open your mouth you can command a room, set a tone, signal importance and earned respect, you have already won half the conversation.
Writer's illustration.
A mentor of mine taught me early on in business "You get two chances to make a first impression. The first is when they see you. The second is when you open your mouth." A concept I already understood, but hearing it out loud stuck with me. And it is exactly why we teach our children to take pride in how they present themselves, and equally, how they communicate and the standards they set for themselves. We are not teaching them to stop being kids. Kids will be kids and they are exceptional at that and need no coaching. But we are teaching them to read a room. To know when the occasion calls for a different version of themselves and to step into that version without hesitation.
The same is true for every adult reading this right now.
We should be holding ourselves to a higher standard. A higher dress code. A higher social code. Not out of vanity or performance, but because how you look, how you speak, how you engage, and who you choose to engage with, all of it compounds over time into who you become and what you attract. And sitting underneath all of that is confidence. Real confidence. Not the performative kind. The kind that comes from knowing you are in control. In control of how you look, and not needing the approval of anyone who does not hold themselves to the same standard. In control of how you speak, and knowing you are speaking better than most. The kind of confidence that gives you the ability to say no. To walk away from something less than. To remove yourself from people who are still trying to pull you down to a level you have already left behind.
Holding yourself to high standards is a job. It is constant. And it can be tough for some, particularly when the world around you is not always making the same effort.
People born into titles and family legacy carry a responsibility with them, whether they consciously accept it or not. There is a standard to uphold. Not just for themselves, but for the name that came before them and the generation that will come after. And here is the part that often goes unsaid. That standard, that commitment to excellence and refinement, is also a key. A key into rooms that most people never enter. Because the people on the other side of that door recognise their own. They see who carries themselves with intention and who does not. That is not a cynical observation. That is simply the way the world works.
And if you were not born into that world, then you build it. You create the legacy. You become the first chapter of something that your children and their children carry forward.
Because those high values, that refined way of presenting, speaking, engaging. It is not just about doors opening. It is about who you become in the process of walking through them. The accountability, the discipline, the standards you hold yourself to, these shape character in a way that nothing else quite does.
Writer's illustration.
In a world where legacy and tradition are quietly eroding under the weight of convenience and modern distraction, those of us who understand their value have a greater responsibility to protect them. To live them. To pass them down.
It starts with one decision. One morning you choose to dress better. One conversation you choose to have with someone operating at a level above where you currently are. One standard you set for yourself that you refuse to negotiate away. And then another. And another after that.
And when you have children watching you, the stakes are higher still. Because they are not listening to what you tell them. They are watching what you do. They are absorbing the standard you set by how you live. Which means the most powerful thing you can do for the next generation is to refuse to settle in your own.
So yes, it is your responsibility to instill values higher than your own into your children. But to do that, you have to be living them first.
That is where it begins. And that is where it has always begun.
