25.03.2025

Why Malaysian men are silent about mental health—Until it’s too late

Malaysian men are raised to be strong, but at what cost? The stigma around male mental health forces many into silence—until it’s too late. It’s time to break the cycle.

Words: Nina

© Getty

For generations, Malaysian men have been raised to be pillars of strength—stoic, dependable, and unwavering in the face of adversity.

From a young age, boys are told that men don’t cry, that emotions are a sign of weakness, and that any personal struggles should be handled in silence. But at what cost? The reality is that many men suffer in silence, suppressing their mental health issues until they reach a breaking point.

The Weight of Expectation

In Malaysia, the cultural expectation for men to be the providers and protectors of their families remains deeply ingrained. Whether it's societal norms, traditional values, or familial pressure, men are expected to uphold an image of "jantan" (machismo) no matter what storms they face. When financial struggles, workplace stress, or personal challenges arise, they are often left with no socially acceptable outlet to express vulnerability.

Unlike women, who tend to have stronger support systems and a societal green light to express their emotions, men often feel isolated. Seeking help, whether through therapy or opening up to friends, is still seen as a sign of weakness. The fear of being judged—by peers, colleagues, and even family—leaves many men bottling up their emotions, convinced that they must ‘man up’ and push forward.

“All of us go through bad times at some point in our lives, and that’s a very normal part of life. But when our defences start failing, that’s when we start becoming susceptible to mental health issues.

Clinical psychologist Dr Joel Low.

Key findings from the National Health and Morbidity Survey 2023.

Read the full report at iku.nih.gov.my/nhms

The Silent Crisis: A Look at the Numbers

Malaysia’s suicide rate has been on the rise, and the numbers paint a grim picture. According to data from the Ministry of Health, men account for a significantly higher percentage of suicides compared to women. In 2023 alone, nearly 75% of recorded suicide cases in Malaysia involved men. The correlation between untreated mental health issues and these alarming figures is clear—silence is literally killing them.

Despite this crisis, mental health remains a taboo topic among men. While awareness campaigns and mental health advocacy have made significant strides in Malaysia, men are still reluctant to come forward. The deeply ingrained belief that seeking help is a betrayal of masculinity continues to keep them locked in a dangerous cycle of isolation and suffering.

Why Men Don’t Speak Up

There are several key reasons why Malaysian men hesitate to seek help for their mental health:

Cultural Stigma – The outdated notion that “a real man” should be self-sufficient discourages many from seeking professional help. Therapy is still seen as something for the weak or the ‘mentally unstable.’

Lack of Safe Spaces – Unlike women, who generally have closer-knit emotional support circles, men often struggle to find safe environments where they can talk about their struggles without being ridiculed or dismissed.

Fear of Professional Repercussions – Many men worry that admitting to mental health struggles could jeopardize their careers, especially in corporate or high-pressure work environments where strength and resilience are valued above all else.

Generational Mindset – Many older men, having been raised in environments where emotions were suppressed, fail to pass on healthy coping mechanisms to the younger generation, perpetuating the cycle.

The Dangerous Coping Mechanisms

With few avenues to express their struggles, many men turn to unhealthy coping mechanisms. Some drown their stress in alcohol/escort, others channel their frustrations into aggression, while many simply retreat from their social circles, choosing isolation over perceived humiliation. In extreme cases, some see no way out other than ending their own lives.

The longer men suppress their emotions, the more likely they are to experience chronic stress, anxiety, and depression. The compounded effects of untreated mental health issues also lead to serious physical health conditions such as heart disease, high blood pressure, and sleep disorders.

Breaking the Silence: What Needs to Change?

If men’s mental health in Malaysia is to improve, the conversation must start now. Here’s how we can move forward:

Redefining Masculinity – Strength isn’t about suppressing emotions; it’s about confronting them. A truly strong man acknowledges his struggles and takes steps to address them.

Encouraging Open Conversations – Men need more safe spaces to talk—whether in social settings, workplaces, or even on GC's "Ask the Gent". It starts with normalizing conversations around mental well-being.

Accessible & Anonymous Mental Health Support – Many men avoid therapy due to the fear of being recognized or judged. Online counseling services and mental health hotlines provide a discreet way for men to seek help without stigma.

Challenging the “Man Up” Mentality – The older generation, mentors, and community leaders must challenge the notion that emotional expression is weak. The more men see their role models embracing mental wellness, the more likely they are to follow suit.

The Road Ahead

It’s time to dismantle the idea that men must suffer in silence. Being a gentleman isn’t just about elegance, etiquette, or success—it’s about strength of character, and that includes prioritizing mental well-being. The measure of a man isn’t how much he can endure without breaking, but how courageously he seeks the help he needs.

So to the men reading this: If you’re struggling, speak up. Your silence doesn’t make you stronger—your willingness to seek support does.

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health issues, consider reaching out to organizations such as Befrienders KL (+603-7627 2929) or seek professional mental health services. A true gentleman takes care of his mind as much as his body.

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Why Malaysian men are silent about mental health—Until it’s too late

Malaysian men are raised to be strong, but at what cost? The stigma around male mental health forces many into silence—until it’s too late. It’s time to break the cycle.

Words: Nina

© Getty

For generations, Malaysian men have been raised to be pillars of strength—stoic, dependable, and unwavering in the face of adversity.

From a young age, boys are told that men don’t cry, that emotions are a sign of weakness, and that any personal struggles should be handled in silence. But at what cost? The reality is that many men suffer in silence, suppressing their mental health issues until they reach a breaking point.

The Weight of Expectation

“All of us go through bad times at some point in our lives, and that’s a very normal part of life. But when our defences start failing, that’s when we start becoming susceptible to mental health issues.

Clinical psychologist Dr Joel Low.

Key findings from the National Health and Morbidity Survey 2023.

Read the full report at iku.nih.gov.my/nhms

The Silent Crisis: A Look at the Numbers

Why Men Don’t Speak Up

There are several key reasons why Malaysian men hesitate to seek help for their mental health:

Cultural Stigma – The outdated notion that “a real man” should be self-sufficient discourages many from seeking professional help. Therapy is still seen as something for the weak or the ‘mentally unstable.’

Lack of Safe Spaces – Unlike women, who generally have closer-knit emotional support circles, men often struggle to find safe environments where they can talk about their struggles without being ridiculed or dismissed.

Fear of Professional Repercussions – Many men worry that admitting to mental health struggles could jeopardize their careers, especially in corporate or high-pressure work environments where strength and resilience are valued above all else.

Generational Mindset – Many older men, having been raised in environments where emotions were suppressed, fail to pass on healthy coping mechanisms to the younger generation, perpetuating the cycle.

The Dangerous Coping Mechanisms

The longer men suppress their emotions, the more likely they are to experience chronic stress, anxiety, and depression. The compounded effects of untreated mental health issues also lead to serious physical health conditions such as heart disease, high blood pressure, and sleep disorders.

Breaking the Silence: What Needs to Change?

If men’s mental health in Malaysia is to improve, the conversation must start now. Here’s how we can move forward:

Redefining Masculinity – Strength isn’t about suppressing emotions; it’s about confronting them. A truly strong man acknowledges his struggles and takes steps to address them.

Encouraging Open Conversations – Men need more safe spaces to talk—whether in social settings, workplaces, or even on GC's "Ask the Gent". It starts with normalizing conversations around mental well-being.

Accessible & Anonymous Mental Health Support – Many men avoid therapy due to the fear of being recognized or judged. Online counseling services and mental health hotlines provide a discreet way for men to seek help without stigma.

Challenging the “Man Up” Mentality – The older generation, mentors, and community leaders must challenge the notion that emotional expression is weak. The more men see their role models embracing mental wellness, the more likely they are to follow suit.

The Road Ahead

So to the men reading this: If you’re struggling, speak up. Your silence doesn’t make you stronger—your willingness to seek support does.

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health issues, consider reaching out to organizations such as Befrienders KL (+603-7627 2929) or seek professional mental health services. A true gentleman takes care of his mind as much as his body.

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Why Malaysian men are silent about mental health—Until it’s too late

Malaysian men are raised to be strong, but at what cost? The stigma around male mental health forces many into silence—until it’s too late. It’s time to break the cycle.

Words: Nina

© Getty

For generations, Malaysian men have been raised to be pillars of strength—stoic, dependable, and unwavering in the face of adversity.

From a young age, boys are told that men don’t cry, that emotions are a sign of weakness, and that any personal struggles should be handled in silence. But at what cost? The reality is that many men suffer in silence, suppressing their mental health issues until they reach a breaking point.

The Weight of Expectation

“All of us go through bad times at some point in our lives, and that’s a very normal part of life. But when our defences start failing, that’s when we start becoming susceptible to mental health issues.

Clinical psychologist Dr Joel Low.

Key findings from the National Health and Morbidity Survey 2023.

Read the full report at iku.nih.gov.my/nhms

The Silent Crisis: A Look at the Numbers

Why Men Don’t Speak Up

There are several key reasons why Malaysian men hesitate to seek help for their mental health:

Cultural Stigma – The outdated notion that “a real man” should be self-sufficient discourages many from seeking professional help. Therapy is still seen as something for the weak or the ‘mentally unstable.’

Lack of Safe Spaces – Unlike women, who generally have closer-knit emotional support circles, men often struggle to find safe environments where they can talk about their struggles without being ridiculed or dismissed.

Fear of Professional Repercussions – Many men worry that admitting to mental health struggles could jeopardize their careers, especially in corporate or high-pressure work environments where strength and resilience are valued above all else.

Generational Mindset – Many older men, having been raised in environments where emotions were suppressed, fail to pass on healthy coping mechanisms to the younger generation, perpetuating the cycle.

The Dangerous Coping Mechanisms

The longer men suppress their emotions, the more likely they are to experience chronic stress, anxiety, and depression. The compounded effects of untreated mental health issues also lead to serious physical health conditions such as heart disease, high blood pressure, and sleep disorders.

Breaking the Silence: What Needs to Change?

If men’s mental health in Malaysia is to improve, the conversation must start now. Here’s how we can move forward:

Redefining Masculinity – Strength isn’t about suppressing emotions; it’s about confronting them. A truly strong man acknowledges his struggles and takes steps to address them.

Encouraging Open Conversations – Men need more safe spaces to talk—whether in social settings, workplaces, or even on GC's "Ask the Gent". It starts with normalizing conversations around mental well-being.

Accessible & Anonymous Mental Health Support – Many men avoid therapy due to the fear of being recognized or judged. Online counseling services and mental health hotlines provide a discreet way for men to seek help without stigma.

Challenging the “Man Up” Mentality – The older generation, mentors, and community leaders must challenge the notion that emotional expression is weak. The more men see their role models embracing mental wellness, the more likely they are to follow suit.

The Road Ahead

So to the men reading this: If you’re struggling, speak up. Your silence doesn’t make you stronger—your willingness to seek support does.

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health issues, consider reaching out to organizations such as Befrienders KL (+603-7627 2929) or seek professional mental health services. A true gentleman takes care of his mind as much as his body.

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