Why Does A Woman Choose to Stay with One Man Versus Another?
We’ll talk about why Doc Love advocates some of the crazy advice that he does, and what parts men should follow.
Article contribution by Berg
Why Does A Woman Choose to Stay with One Man Versus Another?
Doc Love is a well-known dating and relationship coach for men. He teaches you not only what it takes to attract a good woman, but more importantly what it takes to keep her attracted to you. And to be very honest, most men don’t have much trouble getting a woman. But when it comes to keeping a woman, most of them have no clue!
Doc Love's book - "The System" - is particularly notable for being the pioneer in a happy relationship. Not only does it have a strict principle for men to follow, but it also was written by a gentlemen for gentleman with the intention of keeping "Ms. Right" in a happy relationship.
Prior to Doc Love, most relationship focused material was written by women, and therefore had no bearing to reality, or was just about scoring sex. Doc Love tapped into this unexplored niche first and probably has profited the most from it, having been a regular columnist at Askmen.com for a decade, as well as hosting radio programs and seminars for men.
Thus the goal of this review is to give away the most valuable parts of the 300+ page book for free. As an experienced men, we know the good parts of The System from the bad.
We’ll talk about why Doc Love advocates some of the crazy advice that he does, and what parts men should follow.
I. Interest Levels
Perhaps you have heard from many people that location is everything when in comes to the real estate business. Similarly, there is an important parameter that is everything when it comes to dating and relationships. It is the woman’s INTEREST LEVEL in you.
Interest Level, very simply put, refers to how much she loves/wants/desires you. When you meet a woman for the first time, she has a certain degree of interest in you to begin with. But your actions thereafter will determine whether her interest level rises up or falls down.
A woman needs an interest level of 50% or higher before a potential relationship can be established. Thus her initial impression of you is based on your passive-aggressive approach, and only afterward can you actively work to court her. Ideally you want to attract women who have high initial interest in you, so there is less drama.
II. What Raises Her Interest Level?
The three most attractive personality traits any man can have are confidence, control, and challenge.
Confidence: Composed of self-esteem and self-confidence. Self-esteem involves standing up for yourself when being disrespected, and saying “No” to any behavior you find unacceptable. Self-confidence is believing in the principles of The System and not backing down from Doc Love’s game plan. I would also add into self-confidence is knowing when to be sexual with a woman.
Control: Composed of self-control, patience, and discipline. Self-control means to have mastery of your own emotions, and never letting a woman get under your skin. Patience means to move slowly with women; never rush into relationships. Discipline means, again, sticking to The System.
Challenge: Letting the woman chase you. Avoiding being too needy of her attention. Let the things flow naturally to keep the relationship going, always being prepared to dump her if she goes for another man.
According to Doc Love, only if you display confidence, control, and challenge, will a woman’s Interest Level for a man raise over time.
Once you raise her Interest Level beyond 95%, you also need to do what it takes to keep it above 95% and prevent it from falling down. For this you need to practise the velvet traits: Affection + Respect + Romance + Humour. Doc Love refers to this as the maintenance programme.
III. What Is Doc Love’s Principle?
The entirety of Doc Love’s principle is to separate women who aren’t interested in you from women who are. The strategy is to process a large volume of women and let The System sort the crappy relationship prospects from “Ms. Right.”
Doc Love is also a big proponent of doing cold approaches in this quest, but he understands the success rate for cold approaches is low.
Obviously, this game plan is going to turn off a lot of woman, but that’s okay. In Doc Love’s world, this is just sorting out women who have a low Interest Level in you, while keeping the ones who actually like you. There’s no point in pursuing women with low interest in you, since even if you do manage to marry such a girl she’ll just divorce rape you anyways.
Additionally, The System guarantees that the only women who stick around with have the best personality traits possible for pleasing a man.
IV. What Personality Traits Do Men Look For In Women?
There are three personality traits a woman must have if a man wants to have a long, happy, and fulfilling relationship.
Flexible: Does she bitch, nag, and argue about pointless shit all the time? Or does she let the man do as he pleases, such as going out by himself, and pursuing his own interests and hobbies? Quite obviously a man needs the latter, so avoid the shrew.
Giving: Does she like money more than men? Does she make time in the day for her activities but none for yours? Does she offer to pay for anything? Does she make an effort to please you (such as cook)? A giving woman is a loving woman, there is no other substitute in having a good wife.
Integrity: Is she loyal to you before other men? Does she lie, or is she honest? Can you trust her? Would you form a business partnership with her? If your woman doesn’t have integrity, then she’ll never be a good wife. You’ll always have to second guess her motives and watch your back against possible betrayals.
If a woman lacks any of these three all-important qualities, then you should unload her. She isn’t good relationship material.
Also, no woman is perfect (nobody does). She might be really good in two areas but slightly deficient in a third, so it’s ultimately up to each man to judge what he’ll put up with.
Should a man discover the perfect giving woman with integrity and flexibility, then you should treasure her because you’ve found something special. Which is to say, continue to have confidence, control, and be a challenge.
Remember: You date her Interest Level, but you marry her Attitude.
V. What Is The Ultimate Goal Of The System?
The goal of the The System is to have a happy long-lasting relationship with your woman. Masculinity is what makes a woman fall in love with a man, and keeps her in love. Power comes from three sources.
1. A woman’s beauty. The more beautiful she is, the more power she has over men.
2. A man’s passive value. His looks, personality, resourceful, status, etc, all weigh in to give a man power.
3. Whoever is winning the relationship principle. If the man is courting his woman properly, her interest level in the man will be higher than the man’s interest level in the woman.
Note the implications in these statements.
Doc Love is very harsh on beautiful women – because of the disproportionate amount of power a beautiful woman has, the odds of having a good relationship with a beautiful woman is slim to none.
A man should also be working hard to increase his gentleman's value at all times, because it’s the only chance he has if he wants to keep a relationship alive over the long term.
Your formula for a happy long-lasting relationship is as follows:
Find a woman with a good attitude and Interest Level over 50%.
Practice Confidence + Challenge + Control to raise her Interest Level to 95%.
Practise Affection + Respect + Romance + Humour to maintain her Interest Level.
VI. Analysis And Recommendations
For something written back in the 90’s, we have a lot of respect for a system that basically treats women as expendable objects until you find Ms. Right. This is the right attitude for handling women. It’s also a reflection of Doc Love’s career background as a salesman – the only way to move product is by pushing a large volume of customers. The System can only work if you are approaching hundreds of women each year.
But even though most of the good parts of Doc Love’s system are mainstream in game circles today, we still see most players unaware of looking for a giving woman with integrity and flexibility. Most guys just go for the hottest women they can get, which is obviously a terrible idea for relationships.
Using THE SYSTEM – THE DATING DICTIONARY:
If you want "The System" to work for you, you need to memorise the material by reading it several times, and apply all of it without nitpicking.
It might seem difficult and uncomfortable to do at first; but with constant practice you will get better at it. I’d very strongly urge you to persist and stick with it……because once you master it, find a good woman for yourself and do all the right things to keep her Interest Level sky-high, you will be enjoying your long-lasting relationship!
And your conjugal happiness will not fade away after 2 years of marriage…..it will last for the rest of your life…..as long as you stick to THE SYSTEM!
And lastly (but not the least), the principles covered in Doc Love’s THE SYSTEM – THE DATING DICTIONARY spill over into other areas of your life as well. They will also help you in your business, your career or anything else that it important to you.