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14.10.2023

Unlocking love: Overcoming procrastination on the path to finding soulmate

5 unbeatable strategies to find romantic partners for single procrastinators by chief cupid.

Article contribution by Violet Lim and Jamie Lee, Co-Founder Lunch Actually Group

World Fight Procrastination Day is celebrated not to support procrastination but to raise awareness about its challenges and provide a platform for discussing strategies to overcome them. Procrastination has significant and far-reaching impacts on various aspects, such as delayed progress, stress and anxiety, and missed opportunities including opportunity to find romantic partners.

Procrastinators frequently use the excuse "I'll do it later," which can be a losing strategy in finding a romantic partner. There are specific reasons why it might be perceived as more difficult when someone's older to find a romantic partner.

Some Lunch Actually clients who come and seek help to find partners in their 40s shared stories about how they think they still have a chance to get married later and prioritize their career as a top priority. When the 40s hit, they realized that the social circles were already reduced, and the people they knew were already married. They have more limited activities, which lowers the chance of getting to know someone new.

As a result, clients who have been procrastinating might regret that they have been delaying many important things in life because of their career, including finding a romantic partner in their younger days. Some procrastinators realize that they can work with a coach who can help offer guidance and strategy to overcome their procrastination habit.

The Co-Founders of Lunch Actually, Jamie Lee and Violet Lim

Violet Lim, the CEO of Lunch Actually, Asia's largest lunch dating service, advises procrastinators to properly create and attain life goals, and avoid procrastination when organizing life plans. Violet shares these following techniques to prevent procrastinating and continue with life planning before start a relationship:

1. Set a clear goal: Set SMART (specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound) goals. When your goals are clear, you'll feel more purposeful and have a stronger sense of direction.

2. Create a list of priorities: List the plan in order of importance and urgency. Make a priority of finishing a high-priority life plan first to go forward steadily. Remember to assign due dates to each activity or milestone. Setting deadlines instills responsibility and a sense of urgency.

3. Eliminate distractions: Make an effort to reduce any possible distractions in the environment. If someone is frequently distracted by online activities, this can entail turning off the notifications on your phone, finding a quiet office, or utilizing website blockers.

“A procrastinator frequently becomes locked in their self-made nervous system. It often causes a procrastinator to live in their bubble and makes it challenging to connect with others, especially the loved ones. Before starting a serious relationship, which requires mutual care and contribution from two people, breaking the procrastination habit and regaining control over your life planning efforts is a top priority!” Violet says.

Procrastinators may find it challenging to find a romantic partner, but it is still achievable with the proper approach and attitude. Here are some tips tailored to individuals who struggle with procrastination:

1. Establish Timelines and Relationship Goals.

Determine the partner's qualities and desired connection type. Having specific objectives might help with motivation and attention. Remember to prioritize tasks, avoid procrastination, and divide the search for a soul mate into doable steps.

Make a list of the traits you want in a mate, for instance, or resolve to go on a particular number of dates each month.

2. Create Reminders and Dating Plans.

Create a detailed dating strategy with actions and due dates. Decide when to sign up for dating apps or websites, start chats, and plan dates. After the dating plan is set up, set alarms on the phone or calendar as a reminder to take action.

For instance, to schedule dates or message possible mates.

3. Limit Overthinking and Be Open to Change

People who procrastinate frequently overthink choices. Establishing a time limit for decision-making regarding potential partners lessens overthinking and second-guessing. Be aware that sometimes it takes moving outside of your comfort zone to locate your love. Be willing to try new things and get to know people who might not fit your criteria.

4. Learn from Rejections.

Rejections are a normal part of dating; singles need to learn from them. Consider them opportunities to learn and grow rather than something to be consumed by.

Keep a cheerful attitude as singles need to navigate the dating world. Believe that someone is out there, try to picture the connection and be ready.

5. Use Technology to Your Advantage.

Embrace technology to help you meet potential partners. Dating apps and websites can provide a platform for connecting with others, making it more convenient for procrastinators. However, a dating agency might be required if dating apps are too overwhelming for single procrastinators. As in Lunch Actually, clients only need to show up for the date; Cupid will handle the rest.

Keep in mind that finding a romantic partner might be a lengthy process.

Although procrastination can hinder life planning, The chances of finding a compatible spouse still can be improved by being persistent and using these techniques mentioned above. Be patient and persistent in the searching process to find a lasting and rewarding relationship.

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