Lesson Learned from Single’s Inferno 3: The Significant Difference between Girlfriend and Wife Material

Article contribution by Violet Lim, Co-Founder of Lunch Actually

Picture: Single's Inferno. Courtesy of Netflix

Single’s Inferno season 3 is becoming trending on Netflix and is also a hot topic that appears to be trending on social media sites such as X. Every season, Single’s Inferno always brings forth someone who is interesting enough to be a new celebrity. Unlike the previous two seasons, the most talked-about individual in the third season was a professional basketball player named Lee Gwan Hee.

Lee Gwan Hee’s flirting and communication skills divide the audience, making them sympathetic and annoyed with his "games." Especially in the most recent episode (which knows to be the last episode), when he made a contentious statement about two different ladies, one of whom is his type but more girlfriend material, and the other of whom is wife material. What makes it a controversial statement? Is there truly a significant difference between the two types? Violet Lim, CEO and co-founder of the biggest lunch dating agency in Asia, reveals the distinction between "girlfriend material" and "wife material."

Girlfriend material refers to qualities that make someone suitable for a romantic relationship but not necessarily a long-term commitment like marriage. While wife material denotes attributes that extend beyond the dynamics of a dating relationship and may include qualities that contribute to a successful, lasting marriage, These actually imply for men as well, to be boyfriend or husband material. Where the traits are commonly found:

Emotional Maturity

Someone with emotional maturity who can understand the partner’s feelings while being content in their own skin is more of a wife material. It means you won't be looking to your partner to fill voids in your life, yet you have empathy and respect for your partner.

Marriage is about bringing two lives together, not about giving up one. It is essential for couples to be emotionally available to one another. Someone cannot just ask their companion to fill their glass without thinking about putting it back. Listening and being listened to is an obvious indicator you should consider before marrying someone.

According to the show, Choi Hye-Seon exhibits emotional maturity in how she treats Lee Gwan Hee. When Hye-Seon realizes that the guy she adores wants to meet other ladies, she lets him pick other women to accompany him to paradise. Hye-Seon let Gwan Hee go on numerous dates to get to know each woman's traits without putting any pressure on him to choose her. While Cho Min-Ji is being insecure, afraid that Gwan Hee will talk to other women and instead, she’s being clingy for the guy's attention. Although some guys may find Cho Min-Ji's spoiling activity cute and appealing, it is classified as girlfriend material to be pampered with.

Loyalty Traits

Sometimes, when someone considers more superficial criteria, that person is clearly still in the phase of 'searching' for people who they believe will physically fit them. He or she may consider how tall he is, how attractive she is, and that we always find someone better than our partner. Someone is deemed boyfriend/girlfriend material during this stage.

However, when we find someone who shares the same values and has similar future aspirations, it is obviously classified as wife/husband material. When we find someone who meets our important requirements, we are usually mature enough to be loyal to that individual.

Cho Min Ji was identified as girlfriend material on the show due to her flirtatious movement from one guy to another. She always appears confident when complimenting guys, which makes the guy's heart skip a beat. She appears to provide Lee Jin-Seok and Lee Gwan Hee with the opportunity to get closer to her at the same time.

The Responsibility

Choosing an easier path in a relationship and avoiding responsibility in various aspects, such as avoiding to solve relationship problems, disappearing when confronted with uncomfortable situations, and distracting themselves from big arguments cannot be considered as someone who is wife/husband material. Responsibility in a relationship is intended to be faced and resolved together; if one side tries to evade it, the relationship is doomed.

There’s even a bigger responsibility to be considered as wife/husband material, which is financial responsibility. Meaning that financially stable is one of the important factors. Sure, it’s nothing like Mark Zukenberg-rich to get married, but responsibility to provide for the family is also needed. Being someone who is wise enough with their own spending is the responsibility of someone who wants to be called wife or husband material.

Emotional Connections

Having an emotional connection, like understanding each other’s love languages without pushing the partner to follow and treat the person with one-sided love language, is an important trait for becoming a wife or husband material.

People express their love differently. According to Dr. Gary Chapman, there are 5 love languages: acts of service, giving and receiving gifts, quality time, physical touch, and words of affirmation.

Couples may demonstrate their love for each other in quite diverse ways. In the show, Lee Gwan Hee's love language appears to be an act of service, and Hye-Seon is the one who provides him with what he desires. She fed him a bite of food while the other woman, Min Ji, requested that he do things like wash the fruits and physically flirt with him. Min Ji is treating Gwan Hee with her own love language, not Gwan Hee's, and this demonstrates that she is girlfriend material who can give the butterfly feeling in the stomach but not the comfort feeling in the heart.

Approach to Decision-Making

The stability of a partnership is impacted by the nature of leadership qualities, where someone has the power to take decisions in a relationship. The smallest conflict in a relationship can influence the course of the relationship if both sides cannot agree on a solution that will result in major change that benefits both parties.

For Lee Gwan Hee, Hye-Seon appears to be more confident in her decision-making; she never once changed her perspective in choosing who she wanted to go to paradise with. Yet, her decision to go with different guys is resulting in her true feelings towards Gwan Hee. It demonstrates her inclination to lead the connection into a more long-term partnership. For the guy, Gwan Hee's lack of stance indicates that he is not ready to commit to a long-term relationship or is not husband material.

Single’s Inferno season 3 has officially ended. From this season, we may enjoy the show while learning to distinguish between girlfriend/wife and boyfriend/husband material, which is critical for the future goals we want to achieve. Instead of starting a relationship when both partners have opposing views, which can waste time and energy, it is preferable if we can discover the feature before it begins. To lay the groundwork for a successful and long-lasting relationship, emotional maturity, loyalty, responsibility, emotional connections, and the approach of decision-making are required.